Braindead Truck Ads And Me
It's fall. Football is back. So are truck ads. There were nine truck ads during last week’s Vikings-Buccaneers game. That game was so bad I started counting ads. Most truck ads are stupid, but there was one in particular (see below) that sent me down a rabbit hole (see further below). Why does it have to be like this? I know some truck havers and they’re not all stupid (hi Dad). With that in mind I set off to research this “problem” and make it make sense. It turns out the obvious answer was the correct one – dumb ads are made for and work on dumb people, and many of those people watch NFL games. Because I am the way I am, I spent way too much time making sure this was the case. Then I realized this topic isn’t very interesting to write or read about after all. I promised these would have a point, so maybe this is it – I’m still learning to write. Thank you for your patience. I blame the Vikings for all of this.
The ad that launched this debacle
HDNA
Let’s break this down.
"There’s DNA"
Yes, the genetic instructions for the development of all known forms of life.
“Then there’s heavy duty DNA. HDNA.”
No there isn’t. Also, not sure I agree with you a hundred percent on your acronym work there Lou. I believe you’re going for HDDNA. Unless it’s Heavyduty Deoxyribonucleic Acid. Or Heavy Duty Nucleic Acid? Maybe we don’t need the “deoxyribo” since we’ve added the “heavy duty”. I don’t know this isn’t my area of expertise. Nor is it General Motors’.
“It’s what every GMC Sierra HD driver is born with…”
Hell yeah! My NA is heavy duty motherfuckers! And that’s why I dropped $67k on a vanity truck that I’ll use to tow my wakesurfing boat twice a year!
“… and it’s engineered into every aspect of the GMC Sierra HD…”
That’s right! I share made-up genetic material with my truck!
“…with the pulling power to prove it.”
See!?!? I need this for my wakesurfing boat!
“The new 2024 GMC Sierra HD. Tow inches of the world, prepare for glory.”
What now? “Tow inches of the world”? Am I hearing that right? I’m just going to assume either I or the copywriter had a stroke and move on.
The rabbit hole…beware
